When you forgive you partner at night don’t warm it up for breakfast.. When you forgive truly forgive let it go. Resentment is like a cancer and slowly eats away at the person physically and slowly eats away at the relationship. So let it go Truly forgive. The best way to defuse an argument is to be quiet and find some truth to what your partner is saying. Put the argument at rest before the sun goes down and let it stay at rest the following day.
Many Times people get into a rut Forgetting part of the balance of life is having fun and enjoying pleasure. It is a great idea, to let your imagination go backwards to earlier times when you were having fun and enjoying each other. What kind of things were you enjoying? etc
Then make a commitment to make a list and try some of the most memorable activities again.
If you need marriage counseling, I’m located in boynton beach Fl and am open of Saturdays.
561 309 4140
Post Traumatic Disorder or PTSD is an anxiety based disorder resulting from experiencing a significant or traumatic event. Not everyone’s level of functioning is affected by PTSD. Some are resilient and bounce right back, while the majority affected experience some symptoms. There are also those who have been significantly affected. Their level of functioning is so impaired they have difficulty with social and vocational functioning.
Focusing on the symptoms or how one is being affected is actually more important than the label. Quite a few of the symptoms are very similar to Bipolar and Quite often PTSD is misdiagnosed. PTSD doesn’t have the severe mood swings seen with Bipolar.
With Bipolar disorder, in the manic phase there are significant mood swings, risky behavior, getting by on little sleep, and grandiose beliefs. At the other extreme the person with Bipolar becomes extremely depressed and can have suicidal ideations. Some Bipolar people cycle on a rapid basis, while some are mostly depressed and occasionally have a manic episode. Then there are those who are manic most of the time and only occasionally depressed.
When a significant or traumatic event occurs, the brain has a chemical reaction that takes a picture of the event and stores the emotions experienced from it. Even though President Kennedy was assassinated in November 1963, if today I see a black limo convertible in Texas, the memory comes right up including my emotions at the time. That was a significant event that I saw on television and didn’t personally affect me but it still made a traumatic impression on me. Another ingredient of PTSD is that the trauma or significant event was against my value system. Our president was assassinated. My supposedly safe world was shattered.
Other symptoms of PTSD include hypervigilance or being constantly aware of one’s surroundings because something bad may happen if one’s guard is lowered; being easily startled, having problems trusting people, or having intrusive thoughts or images of the event. Another major symptom is an over reaction to similar events. An example of this is a person involved in a car accident having a panic attack when they drive through an intersection and see a car that looks identical to the one in the accident.
There is a filter in the brain where significant/traumatic events are stored and connected to the flight fight response. This is part of our primitive survival instincts. The filter in the brain gets its information from what the person sees, smells, hears, tastes and touches. When the brain receives information similar to the traumatic event an overreaction can occur.
Single event traumas can affect a person’s ability to function, however complex PTSD can affect someone again and again. This is repeated trauma. It happens to victims of domestic violence and by children who grew up in physical, emotional or verbal violence. Abused kids have all the symptoms of PTSD, plus they were never taught how to cope and deal with feelings or how to nurture and love others.
I was absolutely shocked when I saw Ann Branson on Americas Most Wanted as a Victim. AS a kid She was our neighbor and a very loving person very kind to the neighborhood kids. She was from Ky and had a Dairy Queen. Her nephew kept asking for more and more money and she cut him off for which she was violently murdered.
The real message is don’t give money to relatives who use drugs or who are gambling. Helping addicts seems like a loving thing to do. Many say how can I turn my back on my son? Well by enabling and keeping them from their consequences the disease of addiction grows as it did with Ann’s nephew. Please read the book of her beautiful life and her tragic end
Check out the book http://www.amazon.com/Murder-Mayberry-Greed-Death-Mayhem/dp/0882823256
John Lee LMHC is now a Military One Source counseling provider. This is a free Counseling service to military personnel including the coast guard. An example of someone who may benefit from Military One Source Benefits would be someone who may be having difficulties adjusting to family life after returning from deployment. If you want to learn more about Military One Source benefits or if you feel you could benefit from counseling, click on the following link:
Trauma effects people in many different ways. Trauma can effect people Physically, Cognitively, Emotionally, Behaviorally and Spiritually. Physical symptoms can include shock, no appetite, lightheadedness, Nausea, Stomach cramps, weakness and feeling faint. Cognitive or Thinking symptoms can include inability to concentrate, forgetfulness, not knowing what to say, Emotional reactions can include disbelief, loss of emotional control, crying spells, depression and anger, Physical symptoms may include loss of control, avoidance, inappropriate acting out, and drug use.
All of the above are normal reactions to trauma. The earlier one gets help the better outcome one will have. Without therapy traumatic experiences can trn into PTSD.
Things to do. Exercize, drink plenty of water, eat balanced meals and reach out to friends. Allow yourself to grief and give your self permission to feel bad for a couple of days.
There are many studies on the use of Marijuana for the treatment of PTSD. Marijuana takes away the feeling of needing to be on guard, becoming startled easily and helps with insomnia. What are your feelings
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